In my research of historic events that I have been doing to fact check what I’ve already heard for the book I’m writing (yes, I’m writing a book) I came across this journal entry that almost exactly describes the events I had heard surrounding the loss of someone I’d come to know well. I’ve included it unedited, please pardon the tone and quality of writing.
The daylight was weakening as I heroically tracked my subject to a cave. I had been hired to track and “disable” a human female. I made a simple assault with my least favourite goblin slaves, but no! The abomination shot fire lasers out of its eye and then CRUSHED my little imp that climbed all over anyone it felt like befouling.
Listener’s note: I believe this is the one referred to as ‘Snotwobbles’ I’ve got a few funny stories with him involved, perhaps I’ll find the right words to share them with you another time
I had assumed the voices we heard and the images on the wall had been the trickery of prey on the run but, as I tactically released the remainder of the disposables I had brought with me, a filthy leppercan revealed itself to me with a series of bad jokes. I had one dim-witted bow coward come whining to me about gold that it couldn’t pick up, and another was fooled right in front of my eyes by a magical imaginary demon horse. The arrogant leppercan was swiftly sent on its way and my crew returned to completing my mission. Which reminds me; I have some discipline to dispense, so I’ll be looking to purchase some new help soon.
My fight with the not human female was swift, but difficult. My opponent was evasive, and used all kinds of creatures, and magic kept shooting from her strange eye. I wasted a whole bottle of my finest ale on her face, and I was surprised my slaves didn’t flee as the machine woman thrashed around threatening to crush them all. But they didn’t, and one of them landed the final blow just as I was savouring the moment.
Master Bounty Hunter
The ‘not human female’ was in fact known as Joan, and there’s more to her story that you’ll find in my book (seriously I’m writing a book). I’m still looking for more supporting evidence of this time though, so feel free to reach out to me if you come across anything at all!